crash and burn
Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life… You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ or ‘how very perceptive’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.
the joke’s on me..
How did it come to this? It seems that life is slowly spiraling down to a state of bland existence… neither irritating nor stimulating…
How does one become passionate about something? Whether it be on loving someone intensely, fighting most deeply for one’s belief or pursuing one’s lifetime dream…
I can still hear Al Pacino’s words saying, “You are what you’re after…”
Methinks that I’m somewhere perfectly in between of being neither happy nor sad. Ain’t that a tragedy itself?
Am I driven with my ambitions? But what are ambitions anyway but a speck of an ephemeral emotion that merely nourishes selfish motives…a cheap thrill ride that may cost one’s entire lifetime maybe worthless if gone wrong…
what is something not worth living for..or dying for…
what leaves someone with an emptiness of the soul?
I used to know what differs, now I can’t even remember.
Uncategorized | Comment (0)crash into me
For the past three weeks it seems that I have this uncanny ability to make the wrong decisions..
what a dark mood.
Uncategorized | Comment (0)